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Wallfighter

by The Challenged

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1.
You're taking, I'm giving you'll win in this exchange I've showed up, you're leaving before the heavy lifting My last bet, a weight around my neck Could I gave more of myself? Back again, in the center of bed wondering if I stood a chance. I miss you, I'm breathing hard here at 4am Avoid me, ignore this live in risk assessment My last leg's hung up in a cast I'll never walk the same I'm riddled now with my doubts and your silence
2.
Too Late 02:57
On a road I thought we could take the bumps but you're sensitive to every gear shift I'd say, "the big picture's the ultimate goal" and you'd say, "this isn't working for me" Reliving nightmares always plaguing me the choices indecision never makes. The rabid dog asking, "please pet me..." and you avoid realizing it's a mistake....until it's too late. Little flashes of light keep us going but they're just matches burning in a distance slowly setting fires and closing in the toxicity of being this close
3.
Wallfighter 02:57
I might take my fears along for a ride filled with remorse. Patience ain't a cure for all, the restless leg stepping on bruised knuckles. Searching through an old mind that waits, while memory tends to exaggerate. And all the drunken glory in rented storage bins- a fistfight with the wall but the wall always wins. And now that I'm older I wrestle with the boredom of everything and I wanna quit the world around me. Think of starting over, what I'd change and what I'd bring to a table returning the same options.
4.
Feels Wrong 02:43
Sat around the past two months rereading every text message, so I booked a flight to the west coast to outrun my thoughts. I drifted through Los Angeles hoping to forge new experiences, you followed me on vacation- I clearly lost. It feels wrong, ever since you quit me. Found myself in San Diego drinking beers on a bar patio, unseasonably cold and uncomfortable, thinking of you. I've sat around the past two months reevaluated every outcome, a decision's made for both of us...all is lost. It feels wrong, ever since you quit me. It would feel right, if you were here with me.
5.
Somebody ought to know just how you got so cold, left me here with your purse and came back with a poor excuse. Night is closed as you mouth "bye" through the window the only noise I let in is my pulse everyone in this bar is too distant. Someone ought to explain why there's too much ice in my drink, too much ice in your heart, numbed out all my thoughts. What kind of person are you? Do I get to walk you home? No mixed messages this time, I cross the street while you sneak out your house. Night is closed as you mouth "bye" through the window, the only noise I let ins is my pulse, everyone in this bar is too fucked up.
6.
Mongo's 02:48
Never grew up to be the man you thought I should be. But now with older, wiser sights- I think you want to be me. Enjoy your white picket fence 2.5 kids and manicured lawn. Your wife and kids laughing at that silly scar on your chin. You through living vicariously? Following your instincts- where has that gotten you? You through??? Years down here I stand. Your words slurred but still echoing. Years down here I stand. Your words slurred but still echoing...ken koll.... Got a straw in your drink and a foot in your mouth. I'll be as dry as a desert cuz I never forgot. Never grew up to be the man you thought I should but now with older wiser sights- I think you want to be me.
7.
Windshield 03:08
I'll take a day of arguing with you over a day of solitude in my room. I burn my ache on whiskey in a glass, senses deprived- a blown out kerosene lamp. It's hard to be with you, counting down the days 'til you leave a temporary escape artist. A self-fulfilling prophecy I'm ashamed of having to think of you. My inability to keep moving forward. I put my headphones on, try to drown out reality. I'm like a drunk driver flying through a windshield.
8.
Binoculars 03:11
I keep thinking you're playing hard to get. I keep waiting when there's no reason to. The most silent people are the hardest to forget. You can't help reading them incorrectly. I search from a hill with binoculars. No sign of you. I search from a hill with binoculars. No sign of anything except a fog creeping in. a storm creeping in... I get by with my delusion- of me coming home and you at my door.
9.
Life is misleading. A compass points the direction of pain. While the deceptive people always find pawns for their game. The candle sits in the window only so long until the breeze from the storm will blow out all its glow. All you see is old shadows flickering on the wall and all you dream are nightmares. After months you'll realize you need to wipe your feet clean and soil the rug with wasted time and memories. Start to lean backward, hope luck can catch you, take a risk and leave room for something new. And you don't see flickering shadows on the wall, nightmares become new dreams. She's gonna be my new hope...I hope I'll be hers...I hope I'll be hers too, but I know I won’t.
10.
Your choice took too long to make you've exhausted the outcomes Your patience is just a cheap knockoff and you get what you pay for Sometimes paths in life don't necessarily meet but when you left you pulled the rug from beneath my feet and I fall to the floor, try to go with the flow, but what hurts the most is things only you'll know…. things only you'll know As I drift, I tend to neglect what a fortunate misery You're anxious, an emotional wreck as you stole the pieces of me I know you know something...
11.
The Current 03:26
I can't wrap my head around this anymore. This past year has been too much for me to absorb. Wasted 2 1/2 years with someone horrible. Didn't have enough time with someone I adored. We threw love into the river, watched it break apart on stones and foam away. There's nothing left to recover, no lessons to be learned...this current leads to a fall. Control is the shadow I cast by circumstance. I'm holding you saying "it's ok" trying to convince myself. Luck runs out and memory comes to collect the debts (the funhouse mirror, warping your fears) telling you what you lost.

credits

released May 1, 2020

Recorded in September 2019 at Sawdust in Hoboken, NJ and Shitsky Studios in Brooklyn, NY.

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The Challenged Brooklyn, New York

"your favorite 90's punk records eaten by a wild hog and excreted into a Brooklyn alley." NYC punk rock since 2001.

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